Be Still My Soul

I am broken.

I am left in the dust without

a token of the person I wish I could be.

I am searching for affection,

a deep soul connection

I want to fill the void in my soul

with people or words

but nothing I know

can fill what I want to fill. the pain lingers still

though I try, I try, I try to fix myself.

I try to find a way out of this hell

I have made for myself.

I am looking for love so far from the source

looking for relationship that will quench this thirst

But not people, not inflicting pain

can ease this hell,

I cannot gain fulfillment from this.

I look to the past to solve this emptiness.

I dwell in past memories and with past friends

and all these are good to a certain end.

but they cannot solve my problem.

I look the future and al it has in store

but I know for now that door

is still closed.

there is a time coming when

i will know what today’s tomorrow holds.

but today is the present and wishing

for the past and future can’t fix

the now.

I want to change myself to be liked

to be known

not seeing that I am loved by the one who has known

what it’s like to be human

to break and to be.

He is constant, unchanging,

knows each hair on my head

and He sees me as beautiful, as his precious child.

He’s the one who made me and when he sees me

He smiles

because when He looks at me He sees another child.

His Son clothed in grace

He sees in my place.

This family resemblance allows me who is broken

to have communion with God

as a Father

and listen to words spoken between God, Son and Ghost,

the perfect Trinity.

I can listen and speak and know I belong

to the God of the universe who shines

brighter than the sun.

I am known by the king who died in my place

who one day I will see face to face.

So why do I strive to fill myself here?

where everyone is broken and everyone fears.

See, now I know this and in this I stand firm:

the Kingdom of God is within me

so though this world burn,

friends shun and reject me,

everything I’ve known be torn from my grasp,

and I gasp and I choke on the pain I feel

I will praise my Daddy still.

I belong in His home,

I belong with my Dad

In comparison to this not a trail

I’ve had is so bad

that I fall out of His grasp.

I am beloved by my God

and that is enough.

So I will shout to the Heavens

new praise to my King

until the world rings with joy found in Him.

And until the world knows

that only He can take a person like me

and cause them to grow.

He can release their bonds

and allow them to see

that He made

and loves

and is in all things.

So why are you cast down, o my soul.

Find your worth in God

and know. That He formed you

and made you His beautiful bride.

So though no matter how terrified this makes you feel:

He is all you need.

My soul, be still.